So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I was at circle k buying gas and this girl in a papa johns uniform comes up and is like " I've got a bunch of extra pizzas. Large peperoni for $5." then she went to her trunk and pulled one out. It felt like a drug deal for a fat person
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
you win again, gameday.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
Most awkward car ride ever. Kid in the front seat was bawling, 2 in the backseat were ready to fight, and I was giving the last kid a handie. This needs to stop happening to us.
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
