Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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