What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
Every time I stand up, gravity punches me in the tits. This is horrible.
Dammit labor day drinking cancelled due to 3 inch long table saw cut to palm
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
Randomize
