Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
is this the sara with the beer cane?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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