There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
this just has baby written all over it
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
