Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Sorry 4 leaving u in the dumpster last night
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
