just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
What drink are we having for lunch?
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
In order to see him, he made me facetime with his penis, which he had drawn a smile face on. Getting laid shouldn't be this difficult.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
Randomize
