He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Santa Claus winked at me two tables over at the Chinese place tonight I was almost afraid he knew "getting laid" was my Christmas wish
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
