First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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