god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
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