So drunk its hurt
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
So I think I just got a job offer from the guy I used to blow. See, networking pays off.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
Randomize
