he was screaming in a recently acquired accent that he paid for delivery and they could cancel the entire order if they didn't come upstairs
I thought you said it was going to get worse not hilarious.
the delivery boy turned out to be my students mother. now she knows that i have incredibly low standards AND thanks to the fact that he still has dialup the pizza tracker was way off and she rang the bell and he answered mid bong rip.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
Why is your signature on my underwear?
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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