I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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