Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
