they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
