I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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