So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
I already apologized. And I got cum in my eye in return, I say your night beats mine...
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
