can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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