dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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