she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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