Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
i feel like you should know pants are always optional
It was just like the old times. We watched movies and shit. But not like old times-i fucked her hot brother when she was in the shower? Times are a'changin.
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