One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
