So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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