Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Hey was my sperm eye the same day I crapped myself?
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
that would combine my 3 fave things. christmas funfetti and paul simon
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
I'm sorry i showed you my boobs.. I probably shouldn't have done that.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
