Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
