I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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