the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
