new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Eating hibachi. The chef is squirting sake into my mouth with a ketchup bottle. Happened twice, more to come.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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