In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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