His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
Randomize
