I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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