I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
She told me she was the Publishers Clearing House of Dicks. Two dicks a day, everyday for life.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I'm going to get drunk, come back, call my grandma, and eat all those scrambled eggs.
Randomize
