I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Too high to move please buy hi-c and pour it in my mouth in exchange I will marry your first born child
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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