I cockslap morals
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
