his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
Randomize
