the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
I drank a fishbowl of liquor and next thing I know I'm sliding into Zach Galifinakis' DMs
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
I need to align my fucking chakras
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