I can't watch pbs sober anymore
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
You dont lie about slip and slides
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Randomize