he thought i was a dude.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
Randomize
