i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Randomize
