Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Just bought plan b at 8am. Then the cashier asked if I wanted to donate to the children's miracle network. Fml
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
I can't be sure but I think I slept with a clown last night...
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