I'm 3 blocks south of you watching drag queens.
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Randomize
