ugly people sure do ruin things
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
