I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
