you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
