I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
