can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Ok maybe second best. He dated a stripper. Can't compete with that level of hoeness
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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