New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I actually had to apologize for "being too aggressive about harry potter"
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Randomize
