so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Randomize
