her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
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