I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
I think a kid would responsible me up
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
